Monday Musings: Is Blogging For Bored Housewives?

Monday, June 25, 2012

Here's my problem. I think too much. And at least a few times every month I get asked, either by myself or others, "So, why exactly do you have a blog?" It seems I'm always feeling compelled to justify why I spend hours maintaining and promoting my blog, or why I spend hours cultivating relationships with other bloggers via comments or social media. Is it just because my kids have grown up a bit and I'm bored? Have I possibly become (gasp) a bored housewife??

Being a good wife and mother has always been my number one priority. And yet, for me, it wasn't always enough. So how does a woman reconcile that? If you're committed to your family and you don't need to go out and make money, how can you dedicate yourself to a career? And if being a housewife is not enough, how can you enrich your life without sacrificing your priorities?

My personal solution over the years has been 1. volunteering (therefore you set your limits and have no guilt when you say no), 2. doing small or temporary business projects, and 3. being a good friend and cultivating a rich social life.

But the real truth is, as much as I say my kids are older and I have more free time, I really am busier than ever with my family...things have just shifted and the responsibilities are different. We must always remember how valuable our jobs as housewives really are!

So let's go back and answer that original question. Bored? NOT. Housewife? Hell yeah! (And proud!)

So why do I blog?

I just took a little break from writing this post and hopped over to Facebook to check my page. And there was this new message...I get them sometimes...from a woman who recently decided to start dressing more tznius (modest).  She said she loves my blog and asked if I could I help her with some type of styling situation, and suddenly I was interacting with a new and wonderful person and sharing my advice. It was just perfect.

So many of my friends have sensed my confusion and have tried to help me with wonderful ideas how to use my blog as a platform for starting a business and making some money. (Thankfully, I did start making a teeny bit of money via ads and promotions** but I wouldn't say I'm making enough, considering my measure of enough is something like being able to drop $1,000 on Loubou's without thinking twice.)

But do you know what? When I get lost in an interaction with someone who values what I do and I can help them, that is priceless.

Oh I've tried to charge for that too. What stylist gives away her fashion advice for free? But there's something about just being nice. Genuinely sharing your knowledge and experience for the sole sake of helping someone and bringing more joy into this world. And that joy creates real beauty. Which is what the motivating concept of this blog is in the first place.
Just as Oprah says in the parting words of her magazine: Here is what I know for sure:

1. I love having a voice and sharing my passions.
2. I love meeting all of you wonderful like minded people out there. Blogs are a sort of resume that kind of cut to the chase of who you're similar with and who you're not.
3. I love helping other women who are starting businesses to succeed by sharing them with my readers.
4. I love showing you that you can be a part of the material world and still maintain your integrity and values.
5. I love using my creative talents to bring you visually appealing and inspiring posts.
6. I love the validation you give me by valuing my talents.
7. I love being inspired by all of your amazing and endless creativity. I am constantly learning from all of you every day. So...
photo via Zazzle.com

Do you ever feel like being a wife and/or Mom isn't enough? Do you feel bad about that? Please share your thoughts on the matter, I always love to hear from you!

Until next time,
xo
Sharon

** Do you have a fashion, beauty or lifestyle business that you want Fashion-isha to promote? Let me help you get your business out to literally thousands of divine and refined women...email me @ ask.fashionisha@gmail.com for more info or check out my advertising and promotion options HERE.



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34 comments

  1. Great post!! I love my blog, but I know what you mean about sometimes having people seem not to understand why you have one.

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  2. Thank you for sharing with us your values, your ideas!

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  3. What a beautiful, thoughtful and honest post. And just so you know, that woman who asked your advice in the pursuit of dressing more modestly - well, for every woman who sends you a message, there are hundreds who don't and who silently glean inspiration from you!

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  4. what a nice pics!!! =)

    xoxo!

    self-dressed.blogspot.com

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  5. I totally get this.
    I left the corporate world back in November and have found that blogging gives me the creative outlet and "adult interaction" I need.
    Good for you. Nice post!

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  6. Beautifully said. There are so many more layers to us as women than just moms. Blogging for me, has helped me rediscover myself and has been an outlet for my creativity. I wouldn't give it up for all the tea in China. xo

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  7. Your solution is my solution too! Being home with my kids was the gateway to volunteering, consulting, making awesome friends - without them, I would not have the life I have today. I am more fulfilled than I ever thought I could be.

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  8. Your solution is my solution too! Being home with my kids was the gateway to volunteering, consulting, making awesome friends - without them, I would not have the life I have today. I am more fulfilled than I ever thought I could be.

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  9. Your solution is my solution too! Being home with my kids was the gateway to volunteering, consulting, making awesome friends - without them, I would not have the life I have today. I am more fulfilled than I ever thought I could be.

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  10. Great post! Just sent the kids off to camp, and for the first time since becoming a mother, they'll BOTH be someone else's responsibility until 4PM. Everyone asks me what I'm going to do all summer, and I feel pressure to make every minute count. Blogging, yes. Reading other blogs - clearly. Exercising, hopefully. After that, it gets a bit murky.

    I never feel guilty about blogging, though. Blogging has opened the door for me to many people I never would have known and writing opportunities I never would have discovered. If I worked full-time, I'd still find a way to do it.

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  11. I think when something fullfills you it helps you connect to Hashem. Being true to yourself in the form that you were given is what we are supposed to do. You do it well!

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  12. Well put! For me blogging is such a great way to force myself to get inspired on a daily basis and connect with like-minded people.

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  13. I have a couple of friends/relatives who look at me like I'm crazy when the word 'blog' comes up. They have no idea how gratifying it is, how incredible the networking and how special the friends.

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  14. I completely understand! I'm a divorced mom of 2 and when I don't have something of my own, I get bored and depressed!!! <3 your blog!

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  15. Am I bored? God I wish I had the time to get bored for even a few minutes. While I'm not a Mom I do have a great deal on my plate, my business, work, home and my small family. But I blog for the same reasons that you do. It's wonderful to reach out and someone is always there for you and to share. People don't really get the friendships you make while blogging. I've met some wonderful people in person from my blog, people I would have never known or met otherwise and that makes blogging all the better. While it's time consuming sometimes I love it.

    Enjoy your day!
    XX
    Debra~

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  16. Yup, like everyone else is saying--I get this. I love my blog for all the reasons you love yours. I have not monetized yet . . . I could because I get some good traffic, but I'm not sure if it's worth it. Torn!

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  17. hey sharon! beautiful post! i definitely get why you blog. for me i merely wanted to connect with others that enjoyed what i like (which is fashion). most of my real-life friends aren't into this. LOL so i thought starting a blog would help me chronicle my favorite things and share them with others who do as well.
    http://www.averysweetblog.com/

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  18. I don't have kids yet, but I find my blog to be my creative outlet and means of expression. I love being able to also interact with new found friends from around the world! This is why I blog :)


    XX,
    Miranda

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  19. I certainly relate. It has taken a long while for many of my real life friends to understand or appreciate what I do with my blog. Many more just don't seem to read it or care. But, I feel like I have connected with so many like minded individuals online and created many real life friendships because of this vehicle. My goal was never really to make money...I shy away from sponsored ads....but what I receive is much more than a paycheck.

    I say if you are fulfilled and broadening your horizons...it's time well spent!

    xoxo Elizabeth

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  20. Great post hun,i totally agree you, for me being a Mom and a wife was just not enough,blogging was another outlet to express my self.Connecting and interacting with different people around the world that share the same passion is amazing and inspiring:)

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  21. I wish I was a mom and or a housewife! But I do like my life.

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  22. Just a housewife .. or being board.. It's interesting how people feel the need to read in to things. As someone who started blogging less than a year ago, it's safe to say I've discovered it's a lot more time consuming than I ever imagined. The women I've met, the inspiration I've received, and the mental stimulation of writing has been a wonderful experience. I keep my blog-writing to myself (not sharing with girlfriends) because I don't want people to comment. Many of those who know I have a blog, wonder why I do it and what my objective is. Do we really need an objective? Can't we just blog for the sheer enjoyment of doing so (with NO financial gain?) or simply to express ourselves? I agree with Debra.. people that do not blog don't understand the friendships and support system that you receive through writing. That's all :)

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  23. Great Post, I completely can relate, I gave up my career for the boys and being a mom and wife is rewarding but I still feel the pull from my previous fashion life, blogging give me the chance to be mom at home and be the fashion girl

    Xo Megan

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  24. What a lovely and thoughtful post. I am also a housewife, but am no way am I bored. I agree with you 100%.

    http://shannonhearts.blogspot.com/

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  25. Very well said! I couldn't agree more! Have a fabulous day, Kellie xx

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  26. What a beautiful post!! You were speaking my thoughts! I feel exactly the same way! XO

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  27. wouldn't it be nice if we were raking in thousands to drop on the hottest pair of Loubs? DEFINITELY not!!! lol.
    It is the opportunities that come from the platform of the blog that are lucrative for me....but everything is about to take a backseat as the lil one is set to arrive ...8 weeks...EEK! lol.
    Hope you are enjoying this glorious weather today. C

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  28. Hi Shannon, I think you are onto a lot of important thoughts here, I am a fashion stylist like yourself, and before I had my son, I was busy working every day...but after he was born I still thought I can do work and take care of a family (I even took him on TV with me few times.). Well, I was wrong, because I realized that every moment away from my baby boy is not well spent, at least that is how I felt and wanted only to be with him all day and do other things.... household, cook, clean, play with him and make out with my husband when he is at home (((:

    I am very content with that choice and feel very very fortunate that I can be at home and don't have to work, like my mother had to ... and was not ever free to just play with us...and I remember I saw her stressed lots.

    Well, everyone is different and it is important to feel good about the choice we make and answer it only to ourselves. We are the judge of us.
    Blogging is certainly a great discussion board with women or people around the world and finding the ones you can have an enriching conversations with...is what I am looking for when blogging...I am relatively new to that and just reading your post, and comments of others (some I recognize...Leslie for example) is what makes me happy today... and the fact that my son and I laughed most of the morning together...read books and learnt few things, now he seems very happy napping...is great! So, housewife, YES, proud one too!

    big big hug Z

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  29. You go girl! I so agree about your sentiments and first I don't think you need to justify WHY you blog to anyone, just as long as you are getting something out of it......but I do agree about what you get out of it. I loved how you said the interactions you get are priceless and supercede any profit making opportunities..that tells me you are so in this for the right reasons. For me its a wonderful outlet to express myself and to share my ideas with other like minded people, and I get immense satisfaction in my exchanges with others and hearing from my readers.
    I do on occasion feel like I need more, and thats one reason I opened my little online shop, yes there is more I want to do, much more but the time has to be right and for right now this is as much as I can handle!
    I have even sensed, not sure if this is your case when one friend constantly badgered me about "why would I waste my time doing this" a bit of jealousy, not mean spirited but as my husband said maybe she doesnt' feel as capable and she didn't know how to express that. What I am trying to say Sharon is to anyone who questions you, sometimes it says more about THEM and where their head is than it does YOU and what you are doing.
    I think you are doing a fabulous job....and I LOVE your blog!! Excellent post!

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  30. Hi Sharon,
    As many of your previous fellow bloggers said you are right here and certainly not alone! I am a wife, have a full time job, have a retired & an ill father I look after. However, blogging for the last 1 1/2 has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I've always adored Fashion and not being able to be in the industry was always a bit of a soar spot but with my blog I feel my spark has reignited. I have met great bloggers, made some amazing friends and attended great Fashion events. Yes I also get the 3rd degree about Why blog? How about the money?

    At first I felt I needed to justify it as well, but now I feel happy enough to enjoy the amazing ride.

    Cheers to all the amazing hard working bloggers out there like us that bring a little sunshine to others virtual world.

    XOXO

    Maria

    http://onestyleatatime.blogspot.com/

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  31. A very interesting post and certainly food for thought. I'm sure people blog for many different reasons but it's simply something I enjoy!
    http://missbbobochic.blogspot.co.uk/

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  32. great post! I totally relate to this post,as I'm sure other bloggers do too!

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  33. Hi Sharon. I just found this post wondering through your blog and loved it. I started blogging a birthday gift to myself and to find like minded people to share my interest with. i have been a housewife who helped out in my ex husbands business when needed and when my nest emptied, blogging was a wonderful outlet! i have gained so many wonderful friendships, it has heped me get through the trauma of my divorce and not to ention that it has expanded my world by leaps and bounds!! Bored, me never?? I have found even more interests through expooring other blogs and am aslo looking into making a bit of money from blogging at the moment. it has been such a wonderful journey and I have had a great time!


    Veronica
    xx

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